It sometimes feels as if there is an angel on my right shoulder and a devil on my left. They talk to me. “Don’t come out of bed today, no need. Your classmates won’t care if you’re not there and you won’t miss anything if you stay in your bed.” That pep talk comes from the devil on my left shoulder. The angel on my right whispers; “Don’t stay in bed. This is your education, it’s what you love doing. You have to get your diploma and you can’t do that if you don’t go to school.”
It’s like this every morning. Every time I have to make a decision, this happens. The pros in my right ear, the cons in my left. The devil stopping me from doing anything, the angel pushing me to accept challenges and learn new things.
It’s making me tired and nervous. Cause every day when I go to school, I feel nervous. The way my classmates will act towards me, the way I act towards them. Will I be able to get all the information into my head? Will I survive the day without breaking down?
But the moment the devil is starting to win, the angel will come back fighting. Pushing me to not give up. Helping me through the day. Too bad the whispering in my right ear isn’t always as strong.
It’s the endless battle that’s making me tired…